


Head Cannon

by HotPantsLadyD



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Lady Deadpool - Fandom, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, marvel 3010
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-14
Updated: 2015-04-14
Packaged: 2018-03-22 19:58:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3741733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HotPantsLadyD/pseuds/HotPantsLadyD
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I was requested to make this. A friend found a headcannon picture and asked me to do so..I don't have a name for it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Head Cannon

"Deadpool! To your right! More badies! " I yell stabbing my sword threw a man in a black mask.   
"Yeah yeah, I see them, " he called back to me. "I hate to be the one to tell you this but, black just isn't your color. Let me help you" Deadpool said to a guy as he sliced of his head. The severed head flow up in the air, and as it started to fall, Deadpool jumped up and spin kicked it hard. "Heads up! " he yelled laughing at his joke. The head was sent zipping threw the air, straight for my face. Making such a forceful contact it broke my nose and made me fall back.  
"EWW! IT KISSED ME! DEADPOOL! YOU MADE HIM KISS ME!" I yelled holding my nose. "And you broke my nose! " with a quick snap it was back in place and healing. Wade laughed historically still slicing and severing limbs. "Oh man you should have seen your face! " He said looking over his shoulder at me. I stood up and continued with my slaughter."That was worse than when Headpool and I kissed! "   
"You know you liked it. It's the most action you've gotten in a long time." He laughed at me, winking threw his mask.  
"Ha Ha! Asshole! I'll get you back. You just wait. when you lest expect it! " I said chopping off a guys arm, that he maneged to get around my throat.   
"I doubt it. I hav.. " I interrupted him by slapping him hard in the face with the wet bloody end. "Sucka! Told you "   
Deadpool turned his head slowly at me just staring, actually speechless. "Did.. did you just? "He asked still a bit surprised. Quickly pulling out my guy I shot a guy between the eyes as he tried to sneak up on Wade. Killing off the last guy. Still holding the severed arm. "Yup. Thought you might need a /hand/" it was my turn to laugh. "That was lame, I'll never ask you for help again. " he replied heading towards the door to leave "aww don't be like that! You know I'm your favorite! "I followed him as he left. Wade pulled out his phone, from a pouch, dialing a number "It's done. 10 million each in our accounts in one hour or else. " he hung up the phone and tossed it in the trash can. 

***An hour later in my apartment ***  
"Whoo! I'm rich again!" I yelled jumping up after checking my account.   
"It's never enough " Wade practically whispered. "Looks like I'm out of here. I got some things I need to take care of, hot pants. Catcha later " he added standing up and walking out my door with a wave of his hand.   
[Huh, that was weird]{Even for him. I wonder why he left so quickly.} "Who knows. But we got food to order and shows to watch." Turning on my television, I picked up my phone and ordered the usual. I must have fallen asleep, after eating. Not sure how long I was out for, but I woke by a loud knock, bang more like it on the door. My eyes flew open and I jumped to my feet, grabbing the first gun. It was my shot gun. There was another loud bang on the door. I started to wall towards the door. Once I was close I reached for the nob before the door was kicked in landing on top of me. "What the Fuck!? " I yelled laying under the door. "Wanda? What are you doing under there? " it was Deadpool "Oh you know just chilling. How about you get off the door so I can get up! "   
"Oh, right my bad" Wade walked over the door into my apartment. Once he stepped off the door I stood up, dusting myself off. "Not that I don't like your company. Cause I don't. But why are you back so soon? Leave something here? " I asked cocking my hip out as I crossed my arms. "I love you too. But no I have another job for us. Much like the first. Go in kill this drug lord. Get paid a lot of money. You in? " He leaned up against the wall. "Of course. But what happened to the 10 mill we just got? " I asked walking to collect weapons. "It's gone already. " Wade said without messing a beat. "Excuse me? It's all gone? What do you mean?! You spent 10 mill in....4 hours?! " I looked at the clock. "Don't worry about it. Let's just hurry up and go." He picked up my Katana and handed it to me. I took it and attached my weapons all over my body. 'Ready? " Wade asked. "Let's Go "

Starring threw my sniper rifles scope. "So, what's the plan?" I asked "well I think we just go in guns blazing. " Wade said looking threw binoculars. "No, let's surprise when. We'll go in threw that vent there. Lead us almost to the drug lords room. Kill our way to him kill him. After that we other fight our way out or escape. " I explained "I guess we'll do it your way." Deadpool sighed. "How much the pay this time?"   
"You'll never believe me. This guy is a huge pain in my client's ass."  
"How much Wade? "  
"500 million "  
I quickly turned and looked at him. And start to laugh. "Good one! But seriously how much"  
He turned and looked at me, lifting up his mask so I could see is whole face. " I was serious. 500 million, each " He pulled his mask down. I knew he was telling the truth   
"So He's paying a billion dollars to get rid of this easy target? Sweet. Let's go get some mula! " I hammered a peg into the bricks with a rope attached before repelling down the building. Wade following behind me. We quickly and quietly for the most part, snuck to the Vent. "I'll go first."Wade said popping off the vent cover "Oh of course that way if it's booby trapped you get hit first. " Wade climbed into the vent, As did I right after him. "I hate going in vents" I whispered crawling behind Wade in a small cold dark vent.  
"This was your idea " Wade said back to me. "Doesn't Mean I like it. It's like Taco bell. I love it. The thought of it, the taste, the smell the way it looks.….mmmmmmm " I was practically drooling.   
"What's your point? You're making me hungry"   
"My point is I love everything about it. But afterwards. Hate that. Actually this was a pointless story. But I'm hungry Let's go to Taco bell"   
"Wanda, we're on a job." Wade said reaching the end of the vent.   
"Is that why we're in this cramed vent? No shit! I meant after you ass. "I crawled up behind him, trying to squeeze beside him to look out the cracks in the vent.  
"You're ass...is to fat! "Wade said as I forced my way up.  
"Pff! My ass is perfection. How many guys you see? "   
" Only 5" he said pressed against the vent wall   
"Only 5?" I leand a little closer trying to get a better look. When I heard what sounded like a pin dropping.   
"Uh oh..." Deadpool said.  
I turned to look at him. "What you mean uh oh?" Before he could answer the vent was broken apart, from the pressure. Wade and I fell fast to the ground landing in something kinda soft and bouncy.   
"What the hell!? You pulled the pin to my emergency escape boat?!" I yelled looking at Deadpool who hand his hands up   
"My bad. I thought it was a "pull me". But we have bigger problems "  
I looked around the hall full of armed men all with their guns at us. "See what you do?! " I quickly grab the side of the raft as it flipped Wade and I over they guys opened fire  
As the raft hid us, we ran behind a corner of the wall. "Surrender or die " I yelled pulling out my shotgun. "I don't think they speak English " Wade already had 2 mini uzis out.   
"Let's paint the walls than" I said with a smirk. Wade nodded at me and like 2 bad asses we turned back around the corner shooting everything that moved, as we continued to walk forward. Only being hit a few times. We managed to clear the hall way pretty fast. Once the last guy was dead we started to run to our targets room, getting to the door I jumped and kicked it Open.  
"Surprise! " I yelled   
"That's the guy. Way back there " Deadpool said pointing to a short fat guy, standing behind a small army.  
"Who sent you? " the man asked   
"You think I'd tell you? " Wade laughed   
" I'll pay you twice as much! " As him and Wade talked I started to pull a pin out of a Grenade gently dropping it and kicking it to the front of the group of people. Seconds later it went off. The explosion wasn't big but knocked everyone over.  
"Sorry to cut things short but I'm hungry. And you're prolonging my going to get food. Deadpool, you get the fat guy. I'll kill everyone else " I said stabbing the first guy on the floor.   
"Roger that. " Wade walked over to drug lord as I continued to stab my blades into the men on the ground humming "tip toe threw the tulips " not paying attention to what Wade was doing.   
"You know. You're serial killer material. "  
I looked up at Wade.   
"Aww! Thank you. But seriously no. I just don't leave witnesses. " I stabbed the last guy. "There see done. Make the call."   
Wade nodded and picked out his disposable phone. He made the call. And tosses the phone. "Lets go get some food! " he said.  
"Yes! You're speaking my language now!! " I skipped behind him. 

At Taco bell, siting at a table full of food. Wade and I stuffing our faces.  
"After this I got to go." Wade said fishing a soft taco.  
"Where? "I asked eating   
"Don't worry about it."   
I looked at him curiously. Something was off. Wade wasn't the type to eat and run. I decided I'd follow him.

 

After we ate, Wade stood up. "I'll see you around. " pulling down his mask he walked out. I waited a bit before I followed him. Hoping from roof to roof. I followed him threw town to the specialist hospital.   
"What's he doing here?" I thought to myself. I followed him in.  
"Mr.Wilson! Back so soon? "The nurse said   
"Yeah, this time with 500 million. "   
The nurse eyes opened wide. "You're serious?! "  
"Meggie have I ever joked about donations " Wade smiled threw his mask.   
"Mr.Wilson... I don't know what to say. These children here all of them have a chance of beating Cancer! And with the donations we're that much closer to a cure " the nurses eyes starter to water as she stood up and hugged him. I had to wipe my eyes the thought of Wade donating to the children's cancer treatments and to help cure cancer was heart warming. I stepped out from behind a wall in Which Wade noticed me right away.   
"Wanda!? What the hell you followed me!? " he was surprised and Kinda angry   
"This is what you do with your money? That's the most touching thing ever. "  
"It's only for when or if my healing factor stops working. " he tried to explain.   
"Sure Wade. Your secret is safe with me." I turned to the nurse. "I'd like to donate 500 million too " She bursted in to tears and Wade smiled at me. His smile said a thousand words. "Thank you" being one of them.


End file.
